Weight lifted

Yesterday I was in somber mood as I approached the troubling task of advising my father regarding his future care.
I am relieved to report that much to my surprise he acquiesced, with little or no protest. I think he knew what was coming and had himself realised that he was unable to keep the status quo.
I was firm and direct, I find that that is the best way when situations have to be addressed. 
Though inevitably  there will be hiccups and refusals along the way, I feel as though a weight has been lifted. 
I want to make it clear that this is not about me but I would be disingenuous were I not to be honest about my feelings!
I hope that we will, in a short time, find him a comfortable billet, where he can get the care he needs and the stimulation of others and he is no longer spending so much time alone!

My Father

It is Saturday morning and I do not wish to bring down your weekend but I am wrestling with an issue that has become all too common and one with which we are becoming all to familiar.
My father is 89 and his ability to care for himself is rapidly deteriorating. I will not burden you with the details of his problems, suffice to say they are typical of the elderly and leave it at that!
I love my father but I am not particularly close to him, we live some distance apart and if I was honest I have not always been as attentive as perhaps I should have. My sister has been far more regular a visitor than I and her relationship with him is better.
We have come to the almost inevitable stage, where a decision has to be made, for how his remaining years are taken care of in a dignified manner with a quality of life that is right. 
I am struggling with this decision, not because I cannot make it or don't know the options but the approach needed to inform him with compassion, as his son, is possibly one of the scariest things I have ever undertaken. I speak as one who fears little, is assertive, confident and used to making decisions but this is my father and it is very hard to make a decision for a man who is fiercely independent, stubborn and somewhat cantankerous. We know whats best for him (do we ?) and that care and the company of others could well rejuvenate him, however getting him to understand, is a task of a Herculean nature and not one to be envied! 

With my wife and his grandchildren on holiday in Norfolk some years ago, his hair was still mainly dark!!!

www.ageuk.org.uk/home-and-care
https://www.alliedhealthcare.com/

Nat West

Occasionally one has to involve one self in dealing with a bank. In this case the Nat West. It is not for myself, as I do not use their business for my banking and after my recent and yet unresolved dealings I would not touch them with the proverbial barge pole!
Their inefficiency is astounding. What appeared to be a simple transaction has turned into one of almost Norse Saga proportions. It matters not what I have being trying to achieve, only to say that they seem unable, unwilling or incapable of carrying out the task!
A few days and it will be sorted was the initial time frame, a few days has morphed into several weeks and we seem no nearer getting the issue settled!
So here is Guestling's tip of the week, if you are shopping for a bank or thinking of transferring from your present one, strike Nat West of your list, it will take so long to do anything that you will find it easier to start your own!!! 

Lost

Britain lost in a fog of intolerance, xenophobia, ignorance and a wistful longing for days long past! They say time travel is impossible but we are a country going backwards. I walked through my town centre last week, other than the fact that like so many town centers it is a desperately depressing place, shops boarded up, full of charity outlets and pound shops, sad evidence of the ever shifting fortunes of the retail market but what really saddened me were the number of homeless sleeping covered up in doorways!
Now I am not naive, I understand the realities of our society, the hopelessness of those who are unable to manage their lives, it does not take much for any of us to fall in to destitution. We are supposed to be a modern caring society and yet here is evidence of how poor we are at looking after everyone. Sometimes I think we rant about the wrong values but perhaps that is because the are so many inequalities to shout over! Because money, wealth and material things seem to be the defining motivations of modern life, we forget simple human caring and compassion.
It is easy for me to scream from the sidelines, after all I am comfortable sitting in the warm, typing on my nice computer, I don't want for anything, I actually have too many things. Now I did put some effort into where I am in life, it was not handed to me for free but?
I have resolved to raise myself from my current lethargy and instead of ranting about it I am going to see what I can practically do?
Postings of progress will follow.

https://centrepoint.org.uk/

Guestling Thorn you old bastard, what the fuck brings you to this den of thieves? Not your normal greeting but from Digby Turner, quite a mild hello.
Well Digby old chap I am in need of some dishonest information and I thought there was only person who could find it for me
Digby laughed  a deep throated chuckle, clapped me on the back. Guestling I've always liked you and if it is dishonest info you need you shall have it, drink?
I thought you'd never ask, lead on.
We entered a panel lined office, Digby went over to a drinks cabinet and poured two large whiskies. I generally do not drink during the day but when in Rome!
Sit, sit, he motioned me to a leather armchair and sat his large frame down behind his desk. Cheers
Cheers
We drank in companionable silence, I knew not to spoil the moment, I had known Digby for some time and knew not to talk until asked.
So old friend what info do you want me ferret out for you?
This is actually, I hesitated a little, quite a delicate matter and it needs to be handled with a certain amount of care.
Digby leaned forward and smiled, I am all ears Guesty.
You will recall a the affair of the scarlet Jaguar? I hoped Digby remembered, his recall could be a bit hazy now and then, a trait I was sure stemmed from his slightly reckless night time life style.  
How could one forget, He replied.
Good, good, I continued, You will recall who was driving the vehicle that evening?
I do 
Well it seems that there is further evidence of his involvement out there and that we have not, as thought, managed to cover the nasty sequence up. I need you to find out in your inimitable way, where this evidence might be found or if it really exists? What do you think?  
Hmmm, hmmm, Digby poured himself a healthy shot of whisky, offered the decanter to me but I shook my head, I needed it clear and one drink was my limit at this hour.
Well it's a conundrum Guesty and that's a fact. He started to pace, tapping his glass as he did so. Like you I thought we had this one buttoned up. I need some time Guesty, where are you staying, is Katarina with you?
She is at home, something to do with her coitre of women friends. I am the Embassy actually in one of the guest suites.
Give me 24 hours Guesty.

I left Digby's club for club it was and decided to take a stroll in the spring sunshine. I now had some extra time and thought I would pay a social call on an old friend. 20 minutes later I stood outside a shiny red door and rang the bell. A small dapper man in an immaculate striped waistcoat and dark trousers opened it.
Is Madam home?
Of course sir please come in.
How are you Bradshaw?
I am as well as always sir and your good self?
Tolerable Bradshaw, tolerable.
I followed him through the house and into a large conservatory at the rear.
You have a guest Madam, shall I bring refreshments? 
Why Guestling how charming, yes Bradshaw,please
I walked over and kissed her proferred hand. How are you Roxalana?
As well as can be expected at my age. What brings you to my home?
Purely social, I assure you no requirement for intrigue, gossip or information.
How refreshing, its so rare that anybody calls just to see me. She laughed. How is that delightful family of yours?
All well, Katarina is busy as always and the two children are happy as far as I can tell.
She gave a wan smile. Family is important Guesty, I was never blessed in that regard, got to wrapped up in other stuff.
Bradshaw returned with a tray laden with tea and cake. Shall I pour Madam?
No I am sure Guestling can manage. I nodded
Move me closer please Bradshaw. He pushed her wheelchair nearer to the table. Roxalana seemed grayer to me and a little thinner, she had always been on the frail side, of course being wheelchair bound did not help. she had been a beauty in her day and was never short of suitors and offers of marriage in spite of her handicap. She looked and smiled at me as though she could read my thoughts.
I poured out the tea and handed her a cup and piece of cake.
All these years eh Guestling. We have had some adventures have we not. Though it seems you are still performing the dirty work for your government?
I laughed and held up my hands in a resigned shrug. I'm retired of course but every now and then they ask for my particular skills to resolve a situation.
And you here to resolve one of those "situations"? I nodded But help is already at hand.
She gave me a sharp look. Always so loyal and incorruptible, oh what a time we could have had had you been a little more wicked!
I laughed again. I'm not exactly an angel, I've done some pretty nasty things and some damn near, if not illegal.I'm no paragon that's for sure.
Ah but you did them all for right reasons and always in spite of your personal feelings or disagreement with what was asked of you.
I sipped my tea and stared into space, remembering some of the events I had been involved in.  I did not always follow the rules or do exactly what was asked of me. I went my own way many times. Luckily most of the time it worked out but I made some bad mistakes as well. I never made the mistake of not listening to you though!
It's no good dwelling on the past Guesty, whats done is done. You did what you had to even if you did use some devious methods.
We both smiled. It has always been a pleasure coming to see you Madam, informative as well as beautiful.
She giggled. You always were a charmer Guesty, if I had been a younger woman when we first met I would have tried to seduce you! Of course it would never have worked there is only one woman who ever had your heart.
She sighed This maybe the last time we meet I'm afraid. It seems my time is running out.
Nonsense I replied You've years left yet.
Sadly according to the doctors I am already living on borrowed time. Oh dear and now I am sounding morbid.
I said nothing, I've never been one for giving false sympathy to one whose end is near. nothing I can say will bring comfort, best to say nothing.
As I left I remembered all the service Roxalana had provided over the years and how it would be sad not to have her advice and company any more. I asked Bradshaw if it was true what she had said about the prognoses and he confirmed that she had 6 months at the most. I made him promise to let me know if there was anything I could do and he agreed to let me know when the time came.

I returned to the Embassy by taxi, the afternoon having clouded over and the smell of rain in the air. As I walked through the reception area, a rather hassled looking middle aged woman came rushing over and stopped breathlessly in front of me. Mr Thorn?
Yes
The ambassador has requested your presence as soon as you returned, he is waiting to see you now.
Is he dear lady, well better not keep him waiting had we, lead on.
She led me up two flights and along a corridor to a pair of highly polished wooden doors. I was trying desperately to think of the mans name. The ambassador likes to be addressed, Mr, ambassador? She gave me a funny look Mr Trammall would do I think.
Not by his first name then? Another slightly bemused look. Michael I don't know sir.
I was shown in to his office. He was sat behind a large desk. We'd never met before. He was a thin sweaty looking man with thinning brown hair and a straggly mustache. I immediately disliked him. He did not look up even when I said hello and concentrated on the document in front of him. I sat in the chair opposite. I was amused and planned to have some fun, I'd dealt with many a pompous and self-important man and I was sure Michael Trammell came into that category.
He finally looked up and in a nasal voice spoke. So you are Guestling Thorn.
Sir Guestling Thorn. I corrected
Yes, yes of course. He spat the words out dismissively. 
What can I do for you? I inquired 
Do for me? He looked startled 
The young lady you sent to fetch me seemed quite agitated and made it sound quite urgent, do you have a problem?
He spluttered Problem, why would I have a problem?
That's what I am asking. I was enjoying myself.
I don't have a problem.
Well that's good I'll be on my way then, nice to have had this chat.
Where do you think your going? He was a whisker away from shouting Sit down.
It was all I could do to keep a broad smile off my face. 
Of course. I said
I sat back down, with an expectant look and placed my hands on each arm of the chair. Trammell regained some of his composure.
He took a breath. 
I called you here because it seems you have concept of protocol Mr Thorn. He tried to look stern but only succeeded in looking pinched.
Protocol ambassador, I'm afraid I don't follow.
You arrived at my embassy and under my authority and you have not had the good manners to inform me of either you presence or why you are here? It is unacceptable and I won't stand for it!
I sat back and gave him a long look, staring right into his piggy little eyes. he squirmed in his seat looking most uncomfortable.
Micheal is it, how long have you been in this post?
What's that got to do with...
How long. I insisted.
Er 5 months.
Is it your first?
First what?
Your first posting as an ambassador? I grinned at him, it was not a nice grin
Yes but what has that.....
I continued ignoring him. I see and how long have you been in the diplomatic service?
I don' see what this has.....
How long?
24 years.
Good so you have no excuse not to know that this is Her Majesties embassy, not yours. You will also know that I have no obligation to see you at all. As for what I am doing here well that's none of your business. You should also know that I am retired and not subject to your or anybody else's authority. My mission is between me and the Minister who asked for my help. It was not true but he did not know that and a bit of embellishment never goes amiss. I suggest you might want to think on that the next time you think that your more important than you actually are!
He opened his mouth to speak thought better of it and closed it again. 
Well if that's all I will be on my way, charming office you have. no please don't get up I'll show myself out, good day to you Mr Trammell and I left him gauping like a fish.
His Secretary who was the same lady who had showed me up, was siting at her desk in an annex to Trammell's office. I popped my head round the corner. 
I think the ambassador might be in need of a strong cup of tea. 
She looked up, trying and failing to stifle a giggle and had to put her hand over her mouth.
I smiled, nodded at her desk 
Intercom?
She nodded and started giggling even more
Have fun I said and left

24 hours passed and Digby was as good as his word and provided me with the information and assurances I wanted, as well as a location where I could meet the person who had it. I needed to make sure myself that they understood the importance of suppressing that information. 
Of course as expected, something was required in return but I had been prepared for that. We reached a mutually beneficial agreement but never the less before I left, I asked Digby to keep an eye on the issue and he promised he would. For Digby's cooperation we over looked certain activities he was involved in, it suited us both.

The following day I made my way to a secret location just behind Kensington Palace. I was let in and waited in a beautiful panel lined library. after about ten minutes the door opened and a security man walked in
The prince will see you now sir.

Today's News

Well Guesty has a number of subjects that have peaked my interest today, all of which have appeared in the news in one format or another.
Firstly:
Well America you voted him in and now you will reap your reward, President Trump! A man who has grasped, unlike those before him, that if you blacken the media and make people believe that they are lying and making stuff up you can control the news cycle. He did it during the campaign and he is continuing to pursue that policy and it is a policy, all his team are supporting that stance. So beware he was a dictator in his failed business empire and now he is already showing signs of becoming that in his presidency! He is a dangerous man but unfortunately unlike Bush he is clever. Now normally this would not matter but he is the President of the United States and like it or not his term can have an profound effect on the rest of the world. So America you got yourself into this and you will have to live with it, depressingly so will we all and that fills me with fear!
Secondly:
Blair reappears for the umpteenth time and actually says something sensible! Now this is a man whom I would have no truck with when he was Prime Minister. My favourite comment about him (mine) was that he was so slippery he could slide under a snake wearing a top hat but suddenly he has made some comments with which I agree! Those who are rushing headlong towards leaving Europe have had the agenda to themselves for far to long since the referendum. It was a decision taken on foundations that were shaky and at best rooted in quicksand. I followed the arguments very carefully, as we led up to the date of decision and whilst I have always been a supporter of remaining and nothing would have changed my mind, not once did I hear a cognoscente argument, that made think or give pause to my view. I could go on but i have stated my point clearly in these columns a number of times so read those. One last thing I would like to add though, is the many people in this country, who as a friend of mine pointed out, feel only British and do not give a damn for what happens in Europe, where as I have always felt European and care what happens on the continent. 
So as Blair says, those who object to the rush towards leaving the European Union, should we rise up and make our views heard in a more demonstrative way? I for one say yes! The union is not perfect and it needs major reform, it is as corrupt as any other political congress, its full of contradiction and laws that are unnecessary but it is like any large union of disparate members and as the second largest economy in it we should not give it up but fight to make it better!
Thirdly:
Now I might make myself somewhat unpopular here, if I haven't already? I was listening to the radio and the subject of revenge porn came up. Now I know little about this modern horror, one that surely only exists because of social internet sites and the advance of smart phones. 
Naturally I have the deepest sympathy for anyone who is a victim of this degradation, irrespective of the reason why it is perpetrated but a recurring thought kept going through my mind as I listened.
I understand that if you have no knowledge of these pictures being taken and then are threatened by an ex-lover of there publication, then you have absolutely no control over that. If however you were a willing participant, then the answer must be obvious DO NOT DO IT!
The lady from the Revenge Porn Helpline said they did not discourage the people who contacted them, from doing it as they were adults and therefore free to do what they want and was not their business to advise? If you follow that logically, they have made an "adult" decision to have pictures or videos taken, however innocent or for private entertainment they are and they must take some responsibility for the consequences if things turn sour. 
Now please do not misunderstand me I am in no way condoning this nasty practice and it must be devastating if happens to you. Nobody should have there privacy invaded in such a revolting manner by any ex-partner no matter what the provocation or reason, there is no excuse in the world that could justify such appalling behavior! 
This is a practice that would not exist without today's technology and whilst it is not new and most of us understand the all pervasive nature of it, it seems when it comes to this type of intimacy, some people cannot help themselves from indulging in it!
It gives one pause as to how much of our lives are implanted on the internet and how in today's world it is almost impossible to avoid in every day life unless one goes completely off grid. Of course if that were the case you would not be able to read my regular rants!!!
No one would would ever want to take nude photos of me, it would be a revenge on the rest of the world for those to be published!

What is going on?

I want to write about  how the UK seems to have forgotten that it is a democratic country and the government is dictating what should be decided in the Lords by telling them that, the people will call for their abolishment if they do not support their bill for exiting the European Union! Since when does a sitting government even before a bill is read in the Lords start making threats? We often get the politicians we deserve and the lot we have now (with a few exceptions) are a pathetic bunch of sheep, who will follow whatever their party dictates in spite of any previous conviction they may have had regarding the subject in question. The UK is leaning disastrously towards becoming a xenophobic, selfish, narrow minded, hypocritical, bigoted nation and one which I do not wish to be associated with! I will nor burden the reader with all of the history of our interactions with our neighbors in Europe, it is well known what we have stood for and how we have fought tooth and nail in the last century to preserve freedom. I cringe at the tone of the those who cannot understand that a country with the values that I for one was educated in, has adopted in some parts an attitude of anti-immigration, when for much of the of the last 60 years we have welcomed, in the most part, people for around the globe. I despair at our exclusiveness and not our inclusiveness. I maybe a fool and perhaps I am out of touch but I will never understand the intolerance of certain sections of society, when that ignorance breeds a fear and hatred for others who are not “British”. We had a referendum and I reluctantly have to accept that of those who did vote, it went in favour of leave, that I struggle to live with that decision is my problem but I cannot and will never understand why? Whilst I know that there is a lot that needs reforming in order that the European Union can last and function in for all, I will never believe that we are better off out of it, than inside helping to hopefully make it better!

Motivation

I was recently asked what motivates me? It is an interesting question. What does motivate mean? Well the dictionary definition is:  A reason or reasons for behaving in a particular way.

Yet when put into a modern context it is often used to understand what incentiveses a person in their place of employment and get them to perform well. When I was asked, I confess I found it difficult to answer in a meaningful manner. I have reached a stage in life when the ambitions of my younger self no longer apply. I never had any vaulted ambition to achieve in my "career", was happy enough to work and earn. I used what little talent I have to make that happen and like most people it was out of necessity.

So what motivates me, family, friends, spending as little time working as I can get away with based on my need to continue to earn money. I could reach for more, it is never to late to try. I find myself analyzing myself less and less as I age and don't concern myself to much over what anyone might think (with a few exceptions!) I speak my mind (always have) Of course when required I spare peoples feelings, if the reason is right. Most days I would rather not work but it is still necessary and so I do and when I am at work I try my best to do what is asked of me. I see commercial activity for what it truly is and has always been, a way of making profit, all of the platitudes and good intentions that go with it whether about the customer or the employee are simply there because without them you cannot achieve the ultimate aim of making money. Having the right figures and percentages has become a means unto itself. The rest is just the means to get there. Employers in the main do not really care about the people in their employ, there is always someone else who is available! Probably that is as it should be, after all we usually get what we deserve and are prepared to accept. Things will change they always do, it is just a question of how long it takes and if we are suitably motivated