Techno

It's your friendly Sir Guestling, back again on this page.
A word about technology, you know mobiles, pads and all that other stuff that everyone seems terrified to be unattached from.
Now I'm no Luddite, indeed in the vernacular, I am actually quite tech savvy but I don't let on! I learnt many years ago that if it's known that you are actually quite proficient with technology and people get wind of it, they start asking all sorts of advice and frankly I have enough to deal with all ready. I mean you would not believe the avalanche of letters and cards I get asking for my guidance on subjects as diverse as, Llama care and whether transvestism is contrary to the religious teachings of Buddha!
So can you imagine what would happen if I had an email address or a mobile phone? If asked for either I can put my hand on heart and truthfully say I do not have them. In a world where constant contact is a disease, I am not on "the grid" and I bloody well aim to keep it that way.
Lady Guestling has a mobile phone, don't know her number, never want to. She uses it to keep in touch with her girls, doubt she would give me the number even if I showed any interest! Besides it's best to keep contact with the good lady to a minimum, don't want to rock the boat, eh!
I am viewed with a certain suspicion by some in the society in which I roam for my lack of gadgets but that's their problem, I couldn't care a jot.
A old school chum of mine Tommy Handsworth or Racket as we call him, he always had one on the go in our school days. Well Racket, still runs many a scheme and whenever we meet, he seems to be juggling at least four devices, they ring, buzz,vibrate and constantly interrupt any semblance of a normal conversation! Much as I like to see old Tommy, I'm fond of his amusing tales of his current strange and bizarre business dealings, his telling of them is related between phone calls, text alerts and him monitoring his twitter and other social media feeds! Racket is always uttering those words "Sorry I just need to take this"! He is always shocked by my insistence that I will never own one mobile, never mind fill each available pocket with one. After all English tailoring was never designed to accommodate technology and besides I have to consider Pomfrey, he maybe my valet and all round gentleman's, gentleman but I could not in all conscience bear his look of disquiet and disgust if I put a mobile phone in my tweeds! Good valet's are hard to find and another like Pomfrey impossible, he's unique!
Ah, I hear you ask how do I keep contact with everyone, well I have perfected the art of getting everyone to keep in touch with me. It's a lot easier and cuts out all that chasing around and leaving voicemail's, not to mention keeping a long list of contact numbers. My belief is, as always, simple, if you want Sir Guestling, well you can bally well find him!
So long for now.